IT’S ME. LOL, NO…IT’S FATPHOBIA
Hello there! I hope this week finds you looking ahead to Summer and exploring it in a way that feels good to you. I'm sipping strong black tea this morning and thinking about fat phobia and how knowledge is power.
Recently a student of mine sent me a link to a video where a fat yoga teacher described going for a drop in class at a yoga studio that was new to her. They initially discouraged her from taking a flow class and invited her to come back later for a beginner class. She explained that she was comfortable and wanted this class specifically. They then went on to point out that she's not the usual body type they see in these classes (yoga teacher or otherwise) and to check with the teacher before signing in. She basically had to fight to be allowed to pay for a public drop in. They were deeply uncomfortable with her presence and they let her know it.
So, there's a lot to unpack here. Not the least of which is that this is common and a big part of why big bodied people tend to steer clear of health and fitness spaces. This is also why we teachers have a responsibility to learn how to teach classes that are inclusive and welcoming.
I mean, if we are all over fat people to get to the gym and the yoga studio then why are we chasing them right back out?! And the worst part is that the person in the big body often walks away from the situation covered in shame, when it is truly not about them. It's about the fear that if we see fat bodies out and about and living and doing the things that we are constantly telling them they can't do, then we have to question our own biases. We have to say to ourselves "am I fat phobic?". Totally uncomfortable but very necessary if you want to be an ally in this work.
When we live in a society that tells us that to be fat is some kind of moral failing, it would be weird if we didn't have a certain amount of fat phobia ingrained in there somewhere. Yes, even if you are fat. I know that I did and sometimes still do and I'm always surprised when it pops up and taps me on the shoulder. What I try not to do in a teaching situation is flap around and scare that person away, when I really need to take a moment and recognize that the thought is not mine, and then proceed with kindness. Understanding these thought patterns and how to change them is power. Not only for you, but it offers power to the person standing in front of you, who might have been waiting and expecting to be turned away or shamed. You are offering them the power of understanding that there are spaces in which they will be welcomed and included and their body is not a barrier to joy in movement.
If you struggle with fat phobia and really don't know where to start, then I would say to follow more fat yogis, athletes, dancers, fashion bloggers and creators on social media. This is such a joyful way to confront your own biases and the more you see beautiful fat bodies in motion, the more normal it becomes and you begin to release those negative feelings or stereotypes. This is especially impactful if you are a fat person and you desperately want to come to terms with your own body and allow yourself to live fully in it.
And if you find yourself in a situation where someone doesn't want to take your money because they don't know how to respect all people, take your hard earned cash elsewhere. Know your worth and demand to be treated accordingly.
All bodies are good bodies. Yes, yours. And mine.
There's no shame in wanting to exist fully and freely. I'm sorry if anyone has ever made you feel that way. It's not you. It’s fat phobia. And we can nip that shit in the bud, friends! When you see it, call it out. Especially if you are not fat. Call it out. Be an ally.
My Summer classes go on sale tomorrow and I would be thrilled to see you there! We are going to explore the ways in which we can love up on ourselves this Summer (often one of the more challenging seasons when you live in a big body). I'm here for you and I want to inspire you to have the most pleasurable Summer ever!
As you move through your week, be your own best ally and remember to treat yourself and your body with love, respect and kindness.
Much love,
Helen xo
