START NOW!
Hello there and happy Tuesday! I hope this email finds you joyfully checking things off your bucket list. I'm drinking Assam Breakfast Tea this morning and thinking about being our own biggest cheerleaders.
I was recently reading one of the many romance novels I'm enjoying this Summer, and in it, a character in his mid forties catches himself in the mirror and realizes he can't turn back the clock. He feels loss and regret for all the things he could have done or started sooner, and then ultimately says, "Fuck it! Start now!"
This moment jolted me. I felt it right down to my bones. Because I have recently been watching time pass me by. Somewhat helplessly, if I'm honest. I've got projects to work on and creative pursuits that are calling my name, and instead of digging in joyfully, I have found my inner voice chanting some nasty version of "If only you'd done this ten years ago.." or "Seriously, Helen? Another new project? At your age?!" This voice has become so loud that I stand around watching time pass, rather than doing something more productive like...participating in my own life!
To be clear, I am aware that this voice is a dick. I actually think it was formerly the voice that badgered me about my weight, but has since realized we don't do that around these parts any more (please read that in the cowboy voice I intended it). And so it has sneakily moved on to other things. Like sabotaging my hopes and dreams. Total dick!
Stories are powerful things. Whether they are the stories we tell ourselves, or the stories of the characters who reflect us. They have an impact. No matter your age, body type, or situation, you are at any time telling yourself stories that either empower or disempower you. Lift you up or hold you back. And I don't know about you, but I want my story to be one where I'm engaging in my own life. One where I'm not shaming myself or talking myself out of things because I'm worried about how I'll be perceived. In short, I want to be my own biggest cheerleader.
So to all the things I wish I'd started in my teens, twenties or thirties, I'm saying "Fuck it! Start now!' And every time that nasty voice pops up, I'm saying "Fuck you! I'm starting now." I did the same thing when I was tired of feeling shame around my body, and it changed everything. This can of course be done with less colorful language, but I like a solid bit of profanity once in a while. It's got heat!
Time keeps ticking and I feel lucky to be here. I don't want to spend it telling myself that I'm not allowed to do and try new things.
So if you find yourself holding back or judging yourself because you "should have" started sooner, I want you to stand up and say "Fuck it! I'm starting now!". And then get after it! Enjoy the pursuit, and be engaged in your own life. You deserve it.
As always, I'd love to hear about it! Where have you been holding back? What is that rude inner voice stopping you from trying? What did you wish you'd done ten years ago and can you start now? I hope the answer is a resounding yes! Let me know in the comments below!
As you move through this week, remember to treat yourself and your body with love, respect and kindness.
Much love,
Helen xo
